Friday, January 4, 2013

Dealing with bullying.

"Nobody loves you, you may as well just kill yourself." "You're so fat, how can you even walk?" "You're too skinny, are you anorexic? Do you even eat?" 

Bullying. That dreadful behaviour that is such a common, wide-spread issue happening in schools everyday, all over the world.


Bullying has many forms, it can be verbal (when people insult you), psychological (spreading rumours about you, gossiping about you..etc) and physical (when you get pushed, tripped, punched, hit, beaten up, and in some cases, even sexually assaulted). It happens with both children and teenagers, and usually happens in schools. 

Bullying is an issue that should be taken more seriously. When a child speaks about being bullied to his/her parents (and that is rare), the parents don't class it as a serious issue, and just tell their children to stand up for themselves or to ignore it. Unfortunately, dealing with bullying isn't simple as that. Parents should support their children, investigate into this bullying, talk to the teachers/principal/parents of the bully, try and end this.

How to deal with bullying:

It is hard to deal with being bullied. Most people usually say to just ignore, but honestly, you shouldn't ignore it, you should face it, deal with it and try to stop it. Here's a few steps:


  • If you are bullied: don't be afraid to report the bullies to your teachers or the principal. Talk to your parents about it, explain to them what these people do/say and how it effects you. Your parents/teachers can't help unless you tell them about it. It also helps talking to your friends, or anyone else about it. Bottling up your emotions and feelings, and keeping everything to yourself has a bad effect on you. If you can, stand up to these bullies. If you show them that they don't effect you, they will back off. Bullies love seeing a reaction, whether is fear, sadness, hurt... that's what they're looking for. Don't let them see how their words or actions effect you.
  • If you know someone who is bullied: whether it's your friend, your neighbour, your class-mate, your cousin... It's always great to stand up for them if you see them being bullied. It might be an easy thing for you, especially if you are confident or able to stand up to those bullies, but it helps tremendously the bullied. Encourage them to talk about it, and report it or try to stand up for themselves. (Basically tell them what I have put above to the people who are bullied).
  • If your child is bullied: support them emotionally, be there for them, make them know how much you love them, and that they're great, special, important individuals. It's also important to talk to the teachers and even contact the parents of the bully. If it doesn't stop, don't give up. I know parents who have moved towns to get their kid into a better school because they were bullied in their previous ones. As a parent, your child will expect you to protect them, so it's your duty to stop the bullying and help your child deal with it. Encourage them to speak up and defend themselves. Don't be harsh on them, try to understand what they're going through. Being bullied can have a permanent, negative effect on your child's life. It must be stopped and dealt with in the correct manner.
Being bullied can lead to mental issues such as depression, anxiety, eating disorders, self-harm disorders, and  low-self esteem, lack of confidence, insecurity. It can even lead to suicide. Proof: Amanda Todd.
No matter what a person does or looks like, no body deserves to be bullied. No one.

Bullies are most likely to have a criminal record and end up in prison when older. They are the kind of people who somehow enjoy hurting people and putting them down. Some do it because of a previous, damaging experience, and some do it to hide their lack of confidence, low self-esteem and the weakness. They do it to feel powerful and somehow get respect from others. It is important for teachers/parents to make the bully understand that bullying is wrong and doesn't help them. If they think that the bully has mental issues, he should get treated. I'm not saying don't punish the bully and just be kind on them. It depends on the type of bully and why they do that. Some bullies need help, some need to be punished, and it's up the parent/guardian to determine what to do to the bully and how to stop him bullying others.

People need to realise that no matter whether they're skinny, fat, medium, curvy, white, black, Asian, gay, straight, bisexual, pretty, "ugly"... or whatever, they are humans, they don't deserve to be put down for what they have or what they don't have. We are all humans, we all deserve to feel smart, happy, confident. We all deserve to be loved. Non of us deserve to be bullied. We are all different. Don't change yourself to fit in with society's rules. Be yourself and embrace yourself for who you are, because that's you, that's what makes you beautiful, unique and special. Not everyone might see your good qualities (yes, you DO have some brilliant qualities), but that doesn't mean you don't have any. People will start to notice if you embrace yourself and feel proud of yourself and who you are.

"You are born original, don't die a copy."

Remember, I'm always here for you if you want to talk or need help or advice. Just contact me, okay?

Stay strong,
You're beautiful.

5 comments:

  1. You know what? I have no idea why your blog isn't more well known. O.o This blog post has been one of the most touching, actually, no. THE most touching I've ever read. In my next blog post I think I might mention you because I think you deserve more publicity. :) I love your blog, sincerely. And when I'm trying to cope in hard times at school, I'll just come to your blog and have a feeling that it will make me feel better. Thank you <3

    http://ninjaswithmoustaches.blogspot.co.uk/

    xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Omg, thank you so much! This means the world to me. Especially the fact that you come here when you're going through hard times at school. This is what this blog is all about! Thank you so much in advance for mentioning my blog in your next blog! I love your blog URL & I'll definitely check your posts out.
      Stay strong!

      Delete
  2. I so wish I could get into the minds of young children and let them know that Bullies are so non-important! But the young are so emotional and it is hard. My sister was bullied when she was at school and ended up with an eating disorder which affected her for many years. As adults we both look back to these bullies and with honesty I tell you their lives have become ruined - they are not some bigshot and married to the perfect looking lady. I actually laugh to myself when I see some of the people who were bullies at my school (20+ years later) They are not the ones driving nice cars, they are not the ones with a model hanging on their arms, many have ended up in trouble with the police and don't have decent jobs if they have a job at all. The quiet ones at school who stay away from trouble are now the ones with expensive cars, great jobs, lovely houses etc - As adults the ones bullied now laugh at the way the lives of the bullies are now - well I do anyway! My sister was bullied but now is a good lawyer and lives in the nice sunny Cayman Islands having a wonderful life with a wondeful family - her bullies now are so jelous and so they should be and they should be ashamed of what they did. Anyone being bullied please be strong and know that this time will pass and you will be a stronger person for it - but seek help this is so important.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. this is so true! It's a proven fact that most bullies have a criminal record before they hit their mid 20's.

      Delete
  3. Bullying may be hard to deal with, but we have to face it nonetheless. Never run away from any problem or it will haunt your forever! Keep in mind that you deserve to be respected and not harmed in any way by anybody. If you love and respect yourself, you will protect yourself, right? Address the problem and do something about it properly

    -Alana Gorecki

    ReplyDelete